The Happiness Choice

Whilst I agree that everyone is different and therefore one rule does not necessarily apply to all, there does come a point where we have to choose if we want to continue allowing sadness in any form to be the dominant feeling of our lives.

If is so powerful and whilst it can inspire us to do great things it can also become a seductive cloak that dominates the rest of our lives. 

Sadness is sadness if something takes away your joy it can not be measured. When we lose someone/something that we Love dearly there comes a point where our sadness can turn into a habit we get use to it. 

This is not natural.

Instead of foucsing our attention on the joy we felt with/for the one we Love we remember our own sorrow instead. This does not honour the fact that we were blessed to have shared our lives with someone who brought us Joy and whom we Loved. 

We live in a western world that constantly reports negativity as news but it doesn't celebrate or encourage joy and fellowship. 

Therefore, happiness requires effort we have to learn to change our perception of our sadness in order to see it as a feeling that can be harnessed for transformation and good. 

Choose happiness because it feels good.

Lots of Love. xxx

O is for Orgasm!

For centuries in the west, female sexuality has been a focus of shame, embarrassment, repression and cultural enslavement for women. Long before the monotheistic God of Abraham, women were adored, Loved, revered and honoured as Divine Goddesses whose strength and ability to bring new life (or death) made them worthy of glorious temples, shrines, holy days, festivals and priests. An invaluable equal sovereign to a King, female sexuality was sacred and celebrated. 

Sex is the physical expression of primal masculine and feminine energy (nothing to do with gender) and it is in sexual union that this powerful healing and nurturing force that becomes creation, literally or metaphysically. 

Why then do so many women struggle to express themselves authentically during sex? Why are women afraid to speak their minds and ask for what they need and want from their partners? The sexual revolution of the sixties may have given us more sex but it did not give us sexual liberation. What's the point in being given a Mercedes if you don't know how to drive! 

The female role models of today have become twisted ideals of the male sexual ego which has been taught to perceive women as young trinkets and dolls or masculine, old and unattractive in both cases unequal to their male counterparts.

The reality is women will never know how powerful they really are until they are completely free to explore who and what they are sexually in an environment that takes them out of their heads filled with judgement, fear and shame and puts them firmly back in their bodies. Intimacy is about connecting on the deepest most honest level with another human being and the most powerful part of this exploration is the female orgasm. Not the kind of orgasm that just forces your muscles to constrict rhythmically for a minute or two following continued friction (if you're lucky) and then vanishes but the sustained vibration of pleasure that courses through your entire body like a warm wave of prolonged peaceful ecstacy that prevails long after the act itself is completed. 

Like all relationships the female orgasm starts with getting to know yourself first. Name it and claim it! You can't understand what it can do if you don't know what "it" is! Take a look and see for yourself after all you know where your bellybutton is and that spends nearly as much time covered up as your vagina! So take the time to make friends with the most intimate area of your body. Give yourself complete permission to explore and discover how sensitive you truly can be. Touch, stroke and feel your own pleasure. Whatever feels good IS good so don't deny yourself. Enjoy each sensation and follow your own intuition and see where that leads you.

There are lots of different ways to deepen and nurture the female connection to the power of her orgasm but the most empowering connection comes through sharing. Knowing what you want and then allowing your partner to learn by watching and participating with you, the two of you focusing attention on creating the feminine orgasm together and sharing in the magic of the moment is truly wonderous to behold. And it's this level of intimacy, this level of connecting one soul with another that increases our capacity to Love and Love after all is what heals the world.

The Roly Poly Kid!

Tonight I got to thinking, what was the first and greatest achievement I could remember. I really had to scan my mind and was more than a little disappointed as I reflected back that I was struggling to remember anything as a child that I felt a real sense of pride and achievement in and then it came to me! "Roly Poly!". No I'm not talking about the jam filled suet pudding! My earliest memory of an achievement that I was genuinely proud of, something I had done all by myself was a gymnastic forward roll! I can remember trying so hard when I was about 5 or 6 to tuck my head really tightly into my knees and push off with my feet whilst catapulting myself headlong with some kind of forward motion. I remember that I would always veer off to the left all the time and collide with some big beige or brown clumsy piece of 70's furniture, amassing purple bruises and lumpy bumps that only made me all the more determined to be as good as Fiona Gallagher (princess of my class and not oldest child from Shameless - grrr!). I was so frustrated and annoyed that I couldn't get it right and I was trying so hard! If I could just go forward. I just needed to go over in one perfect circle, that was it. Just once. 

I rolled and I polled all off my mum's bed smacking the floor with my legs, head, shoulder, every time until one day my roll went perfectly forward!!! "I did it. I did it. I did it.!!!". I was overjoyed! Yep! So I did it again, just to make sure. I knew I'd nailed it because it got easier. I did it again and again all around the house. I was the roly poly master! I'd never been so happy or so pleased with myself to the point I couldn't wait to tuck my vest into my knickers and get to my next P.E class. I stood at the front of the line (even aged 5 I never did queues) and took my position.

Toes on the edge of the scratchy green cotton covered gym mat, arms raised above my head in starting pose, then bend, tuck in, roll, bungle back onto my feet, arms straight, stand straight like gold medalist (6.0, 6.0, 6.0) and take my bow. In my head the crowd were cheering. My first triumph over my fear, through the bruises and the frustrating doubt to achieve my goal. My first goal, a perfect forward roll :-).

The thing is that was a looong time ago!!!

I'm at the point in my life now where I've set myself new goals, new forward rolls and I realise nothing's changed. Whether you're 5 or 40 when you want something, when you are determined to achieve something. When every cell in your body bursts into life at the thought of achieving your dream because all you can see is your self taking a bow and hearing the rapturous applause of your heart, there is NOTHING you won't do to immerse yourself in your desire. No thing can stop you when you are absolutely crystal clear in your heart and mind about what you truly deserve and it's all you can see, sense and feel in every aspect of your being. When you are that passionate about what you want in your life there is nothing you can not do. 

But I realised that for a BIG part of my life I never really had a goal. I never felt a true sense of purpose, a sense of direction, a sense of being, that I was worthy of anything more than I had. I didn't want anything, not because I was satisfied or that I didn't have dreams or ambitions but because I'd learnt to be afraid. I'd learnt not to try. Somewhere along the way I had learned that bruises take a long to heal so therefore, it was easier to avoid getting them by not trying to achieve anything. I put away my child like dreams because I'd lost the fearless determination and imagination that had conjured up my wildest fantasies and thoughts. The magic of pure self belief that I had when I was a child had been lost along the way to becoming part of "life". How tragic. How totally sad to lose something so precious, so beautiful, so innocent and so true: my sense of self. Where did I lose it? When did I lose it? How did I lose it? Who taught me not to believe that I could achieve anything I set my heart to? Why had I chosen to believe it? Somewhere along the way, my thinking had become flawed and bogged down twisted by life. Life had gotten in the way of living and I'd accepted the limitations that had been thrust upon me that I had assimilated into like my mother before me and her mother before her.

But the truth is the sky may be the limit but MY limit is NOT the sky!

:-)

Believing What You Think Is Often Not Very Smart!!!

Today, I have been thinking about thinking and how thinking is bad thinking! LOL! Let me explain. 

One of my dear friends sent me an email that was full of feelings of sadness reinforced by negative thinking and self sabotaging self beliefs that inevitably had become False Evidence Appearing Real (FEAR).

I believe that what we feel or our emotions stems from one of two places in our Consciousness, LOVE or FEAR. Whilst Love has all the attributes associated with a positive and happy life - Joy, Gratitude, Beauty, Peace, Inner Calm, Appreciation, Strength, Compassion, Self Belief etc. Fear is the polar opposite. Fear encompasses negativity in all it's forms Anger, Bitterness, Doubt, Self Loathing, Judgemental thinking, Blame, Suspicion and of course Hatred either for oneself or for others. 

Fearful living and thinking keep people prisoners, locked in cells formed inside our own minds. It's a self created hell often stemming from false truths handed down from generation to generation not only by society but by the people closest to us who are suppose to teach, Love and care for our well being. These people themselves, our parents, families and friends are often themselves just passing on the negative thinking patterns they themselves have learned. 

Most people base their fears on past experiences, or experiences they anticipate may happen to them in the future. By focusing on these two extremes of times they miss the vital component of what is the most important moment of their lives, the only moment that is truly real, the moment called NOW. It's the only one that's real!!! The past is gone, we can't go backwards the future isn't here and none of us are guaranteed the next 30 seconds yet alone the next day, week, month or year! So why do we choose to fill our heads and force our emotions to live in a moment that does not exist? And what are the consequences for doing so? Is there a benefit from rehashing past hurts and allowing them to dictate our future which inevitably becomes our past from which we draw our emotions in the present?

Basing my response on the inspirational work of Dr Wayne Dyer I'd like to share the following with you. 

Take every negative thought you have about your body, or your life and who you are and put them throught this test. It's probably easier to write them down but answer this question about  the statements  that you have written. 

Is is 100% TRUE? Without a doubt? Is it TRUE?

If it is not 100% TRUE then there is a chance that the self beliefs that you hold, reinforce and tell yourself about yourself and your abilities are WRONG! If there is a chance that a self belief in not true then there is an equal chance that the polar opposite i.e. a POSITIVE self belief about you, IS true. 

Reverse the negative statement of self belief that  you have written, replace it with the opposite POSITIVE statement. Now say this statement out loud because there may be a chance that THAT statement of self belief IS true too because the chances are you can't swear the negative statement of self belief is 100% true.

BEaring in mind these are both self belief statements that YOU have found by questioning a current self belief that is negative. When you put them to the truth test can you honestly swear without a doubt that either self belief statement is 100%. 

There are two statements, one of them is negative and will direct your thinking and the way you interact with your family, your friends and the world. It is a negative thought and such will reinforce ALL of it's negative attributes, manifesting negative results because that is it's ultimate destination and it is rooted in Fear.

HOWEVER, the Laws of Physics and the Universe state that everything has it's equal and exact opposite which means that there is also a positive self belief statement to countrer EVERY negative fear based self belief. A positive self belief statement will direct your thinking and the way you interact with your family, your friends and the world. in the exact opposite way to a negative self belief. Positive self beliefs are founded in self Love and Inner Peace. Positive self beliefs simply offer the chance to manifest and bring into your life all that is associated with Love, the source and ultimate positive force of energy.


When you break it down, there are only 2 choices in life when it comes to how we perceive our own existence. We can believe and subsequently invest our emotional energy into Positive or Negative thoughts. It's a 50/50 choice but it is YOUR choice.


Life is cyclical, it goes round like the spokes on the wheel of a bicycle. There are moments when the spokes are down and closest to the ground but there are moments when the spokes are pointing directly up to the Heavens and everything is possible. The only part of the Wheel of Life that remains constantly in motion without moving from its central point is the Hub of the wheel, the central point from which all spokes of experience extend. The Heart of the Wheel of Life remains constant and solid, in us this is our self belief. Life will take us up and take us down but the wheel keeps turning. The only choice you have to make is do you wish topeddle forwards into unknown territory and explore the world or peddle backwards and go no further than the "truth" you have created from you perception of your journey thus far?


Life is not easy, but it does not have to be hard if we take control of our thoughts and channel the energy of our beliefs in a direction that enables us to find happiness for ourselves and sharit it with others. But only you alone can do the work. No one else can make your life better. No one else can wish you well or Love you more if you don't wish these things and believe them to be naturally yours to own in the first place.


Objectively and Lovingly appraising your life and acknowledging the part you've played in bringing yourself to this point in your existence (you're not just a passenger in your own life) does not involve blaming, sabotaging or beating yourself up emotionally, physically or mentally. It is about releasing the misaligned beliefs of our pasts, the pain and the unforgiveness. It's taking ownership and responsibility about who we are. It's being feeling not just thinking positively in our desire to sincerely change our crrent thoughts into a conscious mind that Loves and supports continuously without judgement.


When you are down and lost in the valley of sadness you still have the choice to either sit down in the dirt, writhing in agony from your own self pity or say "NO". Enough IS Enough! I am sick to death of being sick to death! I AM choosing Light over darkness, I AM choosing LOVE over fear, I AM choosing ME! 


Why??? 


Do you really need to ask? 


The fact that you were born gives you the automatic birthright to be HAPPY!!! As the commercial says "Because you're worth it!".


So what do you choose to believe?


The past is gone, take only from it its wonder and beauty for the rest is dust..

The Return of The Gemini!

Hello one and all, friends :-)


It's been sooooo long since I've written a post!


So much has happened!!! I've been on such an incredible journey of self discovery that it will take time for me to catch up with myself  and blog myself up to date.


My consciousness and Heart have expanded at an exponential rate! I've changed so much on the inside and I've finally got myself some good travelling shoes that should see me through as I walk along the road that leads to true happiness. It's an amazing, beautiful and humbling journey. One that has filled me with so much Joy and excitement. I've figured out my Life's purpose and I've discovered a deeper level of inner peace through meditation and prayer. I'm still ME! Nothings changed that drastically, however, I am more grounded and feel more connected to my Higher Self, the true me, the one that wants to live only in Grace and Love. Sometimes, I think I might go "POP"!!!


Thank you for taking the time to read this post :-) I have thought about writing sooo many times over the last few weeks and wanting desperately to share my thoughts and feelings and to converse with everybody kind enough to read my posts, it's no real excuse but time and Life just kept getting in the way!


Anyway, I'm back and I'm ready to write, I hope you like what you read :-p.


Lots of Love


Jenna :-)

Where There's Life :-)

I was woken this morning at 4.30am to the sound of neighbours arguing and their baby crying and I just wanted them to STOP! Don't they realise that I live in the house next door? That my bedroom is adjacent to theirs? That I had to get up in 3 hours??? And whilst my initial anger was motivated by my own selfishness regarding my life (it took half an hour or so for me to consider that their lives are troubled) it got me thinking about the impact our lives have on each other in ways we'll never know.


We are all precious, unique children of Creation blessed with Life. Think about it. What are the odds of you being here? What did it take to bring you into this world? Your family tree stretches back for millennia, every relative as far back as time goes had to meet that specific person at that specific time to create everyone you're related to. Your parents had to meet, make love, that egg, that sperm coming together at that unique and specific moment in time. Such a delicate combination of events, Divinely timed created YOU! 


And your birth was no accident! You are meant to be here, a thread in the rich and glorious tapestry of Life. Without your presence, something in the world would be different, a little less wonderful, a little less beautiful. Whether you realise it or not you have changed the world by simply being part of it. 


Do not underestimate how powerful having you here is. Like a stone in a pond your Life force ripples outwards touching other stones and ripples changing the face of the water. The soft waves nearest the stone as it splashes are small and tight and close to you, think of these ripples as your family and as they spread out and travel further, think of these as your friends, neighbours, colleagues, commuters on your train, the girl in the coffee shop, the company operative who answered your call, even the farmer who grows the oranges for the juice you buy! YOU touch the lives of millions of people everyday and more importantly YOU have the power to influence how other people feel. A harsh word, negative comment, smile or a hug can impact on another person in ways you might not realise. How wonderful does it feel when a child on the bus smiles at you? How horrible is it when someone you don't know pushes you out the way? 


We touch and we change each others lives every minute of the day.  So be mindful of what you think, what you say and how you act for YOU are an amazing source of energy that radiates for all to see. So choose your polarity wisely (positive or negative) because you are more powerful than you know.


I believe we are souls in human incarnation each with a purpose to bring Love and Light to the human experience. Our Lives are not meaningless, hopeless or devoid of purpose.


Life is NEVER hopeless :-)

The Truth about Cats and Dogs (according to Jenna :-)!!!

I had this identical conversation separately with a male friend and a female friend and felt the overwhelming desire to write about it.


As women we are told we can have it all, that we're just as good as men and that we can balance home, family, work and relationships. Whilst I definitely don't deny that it can be done, I challenge the notion that it's actually right and beneficial. Le me say unconditionally that feminism is fantastic! Women should have the right to education and careers, we aren't just baby making, men sitting, house cleaning machines (definitely not in my case :-)! WE are intelligent, capable, adaptable managers!!! However, we are different to men. Men and women are two halves of the same coin, each side is vital, each side is equal, each side is uniquely DIFFERENT!!!


Women of the world, I know what we're capable of. I know that we can raise our children, go to work, run a household, own our own cars, manage money, study and do 101 things single-handedly in order to get the job done, however, ladies I'm sorry to be the one to break it to you but the price we've paid to have it "all" is emasculating men! 


Modern equality between the sexes is still in it's infancy and I can't help but feel that in our rush to prove ourselves we're disrupted the natural masculine/feminine balance of Life. 


What do we want???


EVERYTHING!


By the looks of it, education, marriage, career, sex, Love, children, home, physical, emotional, financial, intellectual independence - which if these things in whatever order make you happy are wonderful. However, we are WOMEN! We ARE aesthetically beautiful and soft to the touch. Our nature is to Love, nurture and support. We are the bearers to fruition of Life itself. We embody feminine energy. It is the source of our power and we should be proud of it ( I sure am) and celebrate the fact that essentially we are women, not men.


Men are physically stronger, harder to the touch and more resilient than us. Mother Nature designed them this way for a reason! Do you really wanna challenge HER? Just as the feminine role is to Love and nurture, conversely the masculine role is to protect and provide. Men Love being MEN!!! And they are BRILLIANT at embodying masculine energy - WHEN WE LET THEM! 


But our post suffragette determination to have it all, be it all and do it all has destabilised them. Men (and yes I am generalising here) don't know what we want because half the time we don't know what we want! I want a man (preferably my own) to open a door, choose a wine, tell me he fancies the pants off me, drive the car, walk on the outside, propose to me, give me gifts, pay for dinner and tell me "No". I don't expect a man to able to concentrate on my face when I'm talking to him and I Love the fact that when we;re on the phone "being friends" he's secretly wondering what I'm like in bed. It's OK! Be a man because I LOVE  being a woman and therein ladies, lies an amulet.



Ssshhh! Come a bit closer and I'll tell you a secret that every woman already knows...


We KNOW when push comes to shove, we can do all the tings we need to in order to survive. Our power, our freedom and our feminism comes from recognising that although we can, we DON'T have to! Most men want to take care of us. Most men want a woman to protect and provide for (not golddiggers). Most men want us to Love and support them (without the criticism). We nag and belittle men, no matter how frustrating (and illogical) their behaviour may be - we alienate and confuse them. They don't know if they should invoke the essence of who/what they are (masculine) because we're so determined to prove that we don't need them because we can do it all ourselves! 


Don't get me wrong, I'm not canonising blokes! Men, you have your part to play. Women need you (menfolk) to respect and understand that we are different to you. Whilst it is natural for a man to mull over a problem internally, to retreat into himself whilst he works it out, to withdraw, a woman will summon her girlfriends and pour out her heart over and over (cocktails help) just to get it our of her system. This is how women make sense of situations, intuitively, through feelings. We don't expect our girlfriends to charge out like knights to make things right, we expect them to listen, smile, nod, pour the wine and make reassuring "awww" and "oh" in the right places.


Of course a man hates to see his woman distressed, he wants to make it right. It's natural for him to fight for her corner, men don't know how to shut up and listen. They fix stuff! They don't realise that our natural need to vent and verbalise our frustration is just our way of processing our problems before dealing with them. Just like it's natural for a man to say nothing!


Men instinctively know when one of their own has an issue and they support their brother by taking him for a drink where the problem will be given 2 minutes airtime over a game of pool followed by another beer! Problem solved. It works for them just like talking it over on the phone works for us. Two halves - same coin!!!


Don't get me wrong, neither sex is perfect and we are all individuals with our own lives to contend with, however, fundamentally we are Yin and Yang, masculine and feminine, his and hers and there's nothing wrong with acknowledging it!


So let Love live.


:-)

Blog It!!! In the beginning...

Wow! So this is Blogging and this is my first Blog post? Blog Spot? Blog Bit? I don't know! What is the technical term for posting a nonsensical piece of rambling? I really am the world's worst technophobe, grrrr! I have NO idea what I'm doing suffice to say that it feels good, it feels right and perfectly timed.


I've spent most of today (lazily) putting this blog together and for me it's an achievement and I'm proud of it. There's something satisfying about doing something that you enjoy, knowing that you are on a new path, a new journey to somewhere unknown. I can't quite find adequate words to explain how I'm feeling right now or what's stirring inside me. 


About 3 weeks ago I met an incredible person who inspired me to reach down inside myself and dust off my "gift", an ability to understand how people are feeling, offer Loving, supportive and inspiring advice that for some reason seems to help other people (and me) in their daily lives.


I have nothing to sell, or anything to trade. I am my product! All I want to do is remind everyone that we are all worth something and that Happiness, Inner Peace and Love are in fact rights we were all born with and that are attainable, if you believe and trust in the content of your inner self and in the guidance of your heart. 


I often get this weird little tingle (it's the only word I can think of), a rush of energy that lives in my body cells that I often can't explain that tells me that there is more to living and Life itself than my limited 5 senses can experience and it's feeling/intuition that forms the basis of my Belief in the potential and goodness of mankind. My Belief is built on a Faith I have that I am but a drop in an Ocean that forms something bigger than me. I don't fully understand it and maybe I'm not to meant to because I'm human incarnate and I accept this, it gives me freedom to experience the richness of my experiences and the lessons I learn.

Life is full of lessons to learn, some easy, some hard, some painful and some are just fun. I've tried hard see the best in every situation I have been in - especially the ones that left me broken and often in tears on the bathroom floor sobbing "why?".

But each time I've gotten up, dusted myself off, laughed and gone positively back out into the world a little wiser but never jaded :-).

So here I am ready and willing to share my experiences and thoughts with the world!



Writing is not a chore to me, it's a pleasure that I enjoy and that I hope will be pleasurable to anyone who graciously decides to read my thoughts and share their own opinions on what I pen.


So to anyone reading these words right now "Hello" and welcome to my little corner of cyberspace. I hope you'll bear with me, get to know me, converse with me and come back and do it all again. 

Jenna :-)